Communication is how people understand one another. It is how we express ideas and feelings with one another.
Communication involves the spoken words and the tone of voice we use while speaking. It also includes body language. How are we posturing, what are the facial expressions we display?
The problem is that many times communication doesn’t happen. What the speaker is trying to say does not get across to the listener.
Effective communication has a single object: shared understanding.
– Michael Hyatt
Align
So, how can we come to this understanding?
One thing is to be aware of how the message is being communicated. Are the words and tone we use, matching our body language? Does it align with what we want to convey?
If there is a disconnect in any of these things, the listener might get confused. Because of this ambiguity, there is no shared understanding.
The speaker needs to be cognizant of the words he chooses. Careful to align the facial cues and the tone of his voice. This ensures the message is being portrayed the way he intends.
Clarify
Michael Hyatt in his book No-Fail Communication says that clear communication is when the person’s understanding matches yours.
How do you get clear understanding among everyone?
Besides being aware of how the message is communicated, the speaker needs to be specific and make sure that the message has been spoken.
Have you ever had someone tell you to fix something? You did it perfectly from what you understood. However, when they checked, it was not the way they wanted it.
The problem was they didn’t communicate it clear enough. If the person would have been more specific, you probably would have followed his directions.
This reminds me of the Tide commercial. A father left a note for his son to do the laundry. When the father comes home he praises the son for doing them. Then he notices the clothes weren’t folded. The son says, “That wasn’t in the note”. The father needed to be more specific if he wanted the clothes to be folded.
Next, make sure the message is actually communicated. Unfortunately, people sometimes think things in their head without actually speaking the thoughts out loud.
Have you ever had that happen? You start talking about a subject and get a strange look. You started your conversation mid thought…
Nothing like starting out with confusion. Hopefully, your audience will ask for clarification. Sadly this doesn’t always happen.
At that moment there is a disconnect. The person thinks he spoke it out loud, but he didn’t. This causes the sender’s message to be broken.
The person thinks his thoughts were expressed when they really weren’t. Making sure that the thoughts are communicated out loud can help lead to clear communication for everyone.
Evaluate
What are some ways to implement clear communication into your life?
- Align – Be mindful of your words, facial expressions, and tone. Ask for feedback on how your communication aligns. This can help you focus on specific areas that need work. Make sure you consider the feedback and don’t become defensive. Feedback is a good way to help you become a better communicator.
- Clarify – Ask the person for clarification once you communicate something. Some questions to ask the person could be
- What did you hear me say?
- What is the next step?
- What is it I want you to do?
- What else do you need from me to accomplish this goal?
- Evaluate – Do a self-evaluation after a conversation. Some questions to help you evaluate could be
- Was I clear?
- Was I specific?
- Did I speak out loud or just in my head?
- Can the other person do what I want with the information I gave him?
Small Steps
Integrating these ideas into your communication with others will take some time. But the time spent will be well worth it.
The more you align, clarify, and evaluate your communication with others, the better you will get at integrating clear communication into your life.
How have you been working on your communication? Let us know in the comments below.